Smashed, Squashed, Splattered, Chewed, Chunked and Spewed by Lance Carbuncle

Synopsis:  Best friend and borderline lover of our main character has run away from home, his name Idjit Caloot.  While said narrator is in the process of moving his 35 year old, living at home, jobless self to Florida he ventures off on a quest of epic proportions to find his best friend.  On this quest he meets up with an old friend, fathers a love child from a soul stealing waitress, meets Fat Elvis (who the actual Elvis is trying to impersonate), blows up a sombrero topped water tower, travels with a 102 year old blues man being hunted by hell dogs, encounters the foul smelling, highly hunted Skunk Ape, dies, carries his dead fathers body around in a moving truck, and encounters more Pedro's than thought possible in one hotel.  Will he ever find his dog, will he make it out alive with his soul in tact, will he survive the beating he has received throughout this adventure?  Whether he does or not, with the help of a color cast of characters, it sure makes for a great story.

My review:  I knew going into this book that this was slapstick/crude humor and I just loved it.  Reverend Carbuncle, as the author refers to himself, is a weird dude, beyond weird.  So weird that I cannot wait to read his next books.  This book/humor is not for everyone, I mean it starts out with the narrator recalling a bad ecstasy trip that ends with him waking up being poked and prodded by a male nurse asking him to not tell anyone why his butt hurts.  Some may be offended, some will think it's stupid, and some will just not got it.  It is because of all these reasons I loved it so much.  There are a million and one adventures in this book, a million and one things that could and do go wrong for our narrator, all of them weaving into a story that I could not put down.  I read this on my kindle and carried that little electronic piece of magnificence with me everywhere I went, even if I just got in a few minutes of reading time squeezed in on the john.

This book is not going to win the next Noble Prize but if they make a prize for writing a book that keeps you laughing, sucks you in and provides you with a fantastic little story, then this one would be a solid winner.  Want a break from the norm, a glimpse into the life of an author with a fantastic imagination, then buckle up because this is one crazy ride.

My rating:  7
Pages:  260
Author website:  http://lancecarbuncle.com/lancecarbuncle.com/Home_page.html

Brew by Bill Braddock

Synopsis:  A small college town turns into a murderous den of destruction one night after a massive football game.  We follow a slew of colorful characters from the start of the devastation to the end.  A "green" conservative group of radicals decides to spike the local brewery with a homemade chemical concoction that will turn the drinkers poop green.  What this group does not know is that the chemist is a mad man with a revenge plot against pretty much everyone and modifies the compound to turn everyone into zombies instead.  The next 24 hours turns into a survival story of epic proportions.  Enjoy the ride.

My review:  I loved this book.  Let me preface that this book is disturbing and disgusting and fantastic.  I did not know before getting into this book that it was about zombies, well flesh eating, sex-crazed, pain inflicting, 24 hour temporary zombies to be exact.  Once again a zombie book where the word zombie is not used once.  Great writing throughout.  Great character building.  I also loved that this author was willing to kill off some main characters, well almost all of them to be exact.  Some of the scenes were so well written I can still picture them in my head.  This is the first book written by Bill Braddock, and I hope for more books sooner rather than later.  One thing I will note, as mentioned slightly above, is that this book is not for the faint of heart and  is not for everyone.  I love reading books that push the limits of what we think is acceptable, and this book does not disappoint.  Enjoy if you dare.

My rating: 7
Pages: 273
Author website: http://www.billbraddock.com/p/home.html

Me Before You by JoJo Moyes

Synopsis:  Louisa is a twenty something girl, recently out of a job and looking for any work she can to help support her family.  While working with a recruiter an opportunity comes up to help look after a young man recently hurt in an automobile accident, Will Traynor, a former thrill seeking enthusiast, sky diving, bungee jumping, CEO quadriplegic who is now confined to a wheel chair and severely depressed.  Will cannot move his body below the neck other than some very slight movement in his fingers and requires 24 hour a day in home medical care.  Louisa, mostly due to the pay decides to accept this care taker position as long as she does not have wipe his bum.  She works with Will continuously with the hope of getting him out of the house and back into the world again, not only to lift his spirits but to try and bring back his previous zealous outlook on life.  She will find that in this short time how difficult this task is and more importantly just how difficult all of this is for Will.

My review:  Wow, a powerful book indeed.  I had no idea how this book was going to turn out.  Not just the ending but the story line itself.  This book was beautifully written and definitely a cutting edge story like I have never seen.  My initial fear with this book was that it would be what I call a "girly book", I was even hesitant to read it because of that fact.  I am not saying that I am opposed to girly books but I didn't want to end up with a sobbing romance novel.  This book was anything but that and still has me sitting here thinking about it.  This is definitely a book club style book, I can very clearly see a bunch of girls sitting around drinking wine talking about this book with tears in their eyes.  Highly recommended!!

My rating:  8
Pages:  369
Author website:  http://www.jojomoyes.com/